Quick to Listen

God is teaching me the value of a simple conversation: an old high school aquaintance talking deeply about her spirituality, a professor explaining his religion background, a homeless woman giving some of her story, catching up with a younger sibling, making cards with a 10 year old as she explains her Christmas plans, listening to my family express faith, and so many others in the past two weeks.

All of these interactions have a few things in common: listening more than speaking.

THIS IS HARD FOR ME!!!

Seriously. I can't say that loud or clear enough. I SUCK at listening. I have opinions, STRONG opinions. I like to make them known, more or less because I believe they are right. Now, some of these instances had a reverse response; the girl at Po Hope and the woman on the street made me silent... but not because I was really listening. I was silent out of guilt, and perhaps empathy or compassion, certainly out of awkwardness.

The point is that conversations about anything of substance are never easy, at least not to do well. There is a reason God instructs us to be "quick to listen, slow to speak" ("slow to anger" follows too). Listening is the key to understanding.

Proverbs is teeming with wisdom about inclining your ear, being attentive, seeking understanding, listening to advice or guidance, receiving commandments, and laying up wisdom (instead of speaking). There is much to be gained from listening.

Listening is an act of humility. It is saying to the other person "I believe you have something to teach me. I recognize your wisdom, your experience, the understanding you've achieved. I want to know what you know. I want to understand you better, and in doing so, understand more about life."

Speaking is an act of pride. It assumes I have something to contribute. That I know the "right" answer, that I have "good" advice ready. That my perspective is more valuable than fully understanding where YOU are coming from or what YOU have to say.

I believe in taking turns in conversation; I would say conversation requires it. However, I talk too much.

God, give me humility to listen :)

(Yes, it is strange to blog this... and while I started out thinking this is a noteworthy insight... I now think it is merely a friendly reminder, some of you may be glad and in need of it. Others, I ask you simply rejoice with me as I am re-learning this valuable concept!)

God bless!